I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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