my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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