I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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