singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Watching her eat just hurts me
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
