Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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