The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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