Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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