So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
