i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
you never un-have a 4some
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize