Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
