i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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