I will die if light touches me.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize