can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
