White coat. Heels.
her vagine was all disorganized.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
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