at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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