So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Randomize
