i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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