you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
