How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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