I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
