yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize