I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
