Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
