btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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