I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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