He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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