I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
