Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
