We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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