Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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