I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
