and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It's no shave November. This is our time.
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