she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
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