I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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