I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Damn victory sex feels great
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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