i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
