She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
