Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
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