Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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