Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize