I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
