Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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