even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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