After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
