This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I am midnight drunk by noon
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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