dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
even my farts smell like vagina
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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