Have you finally orgasmed yet?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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