mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old