He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
