It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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