I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Randomize
